Dear sports fans and smokers,
Are you going to miss the Olympics this year due to the coronavirus? Will there be no one to support?
Let’s put together our own variation on the Olympics turned inside out, at a time when many of our certainties have been turned inside out anyway.
Let’s prove that we have a sense of humor even when times are tough. We take fun seriously!
Let’s organize an international competition in Non-smoking.
- 1A competition for smokers who fight the surge of the urge.
- 2The aim is to reduce your smoking performance.
- 3Everyone who gives up at least one cigarette is a winner. Vaping instead of smoking counts, too.
- 4Doping (the use of nicotine substitutes) is expressly allowed in order to increase your chances. (Potential protests by some countries claiming it deprives them of their traditional advantage will not be accepted.)
- 5Participants will compete in their own homes. Free from stress, no need to dress (up).
- 6The more you become involved, the more free time you earn.
- 7No discrimination related to age, gender or state of health.
- 8Even though it’s an amateur competition, financial awards are granted (money savings).
- 9Unnamed tobacco companies will act as involuntary sponsors.
- 10Every success will be a reward in itself. The summary results will be announced subsequently by the customs office.
You are not alone
The courageous smokers will be supported by fans ranging from their friends to famous athletes.
Let every unsmoked cigarette be a source of personal confidence and a pillar of the national team’s results!
They will try to quit completely, aiming at a whole year without cigarettes.
They will limit their cigarette consumption by half.
5km, 3km, 800m
They will support the team’s performance by giving up even just a few cigarettes a day.
Training makes perfect
There are no losers. Even a marathon can be completed by parts or alternating running with walking. Repeated attempts are allowed, no pause is definitive.
Spread the word among your friends from abroad.
Let’s remotely cross swords with other nations while appreciating their achievements paid for with renunciation!
Unnamed companies and political parties sponsored by them may disagree and may even protest against it. They have the money and the influence to spread the contrary view.